I have big plans, you know.  And some of those big plans involved working like a rented mule this weekend; I was going (and still plan) to work on my poetry presentation (en français), my personal statements, my sociolinguistics paper (en français aussi) and my phonology assignment.  Yesterday, obviously, it wasn’t going to happen.  And Wednesday, I did do a little work, but I gave up early.  Today was going to be the day that I really dug in and started the hard-core work.  Instead, I ate some pie, napped, ate more pie.  Not especially productive, though there are still a few hours left today for some work.

I am not looking forward to next week for many reasons.  One reason is the impending presentation (on Monday), followed by the fact that I’m yet another week closer to the end of the semester, and I don’t feel I’m any closer to getting all my shit done.  Lastly, I have, in my best-fingers-in-my-ears-singing-loudly fashion, ignored an interpersonal problem, which has now kicked me in the ass.  Metaphorically speaking, I saw something in the grass and thought it was a stick, but when I got closer it turned out to be a rake, which I stepped on, and then it smacked me in the face.

One of the students that I occasionally work with used to joke that we were going to go away together.  I assumed it was all light-hearted joking, and never bothered to take a firm stand on the whole thing.  He had been flirting more and more with me, but I figured (again) that it was all just talk, and I ignored it.  On Tuesday, he told me that I was beautiful, and so on.  I was so uncomfortable, that I ended up laughing, which I’m sure sent a mixed message.  As it was happening, I realized that it was totally the wrong response to the situation, but in my defense, it was only then that it became clear that he hadn’t been joking this whole time, and I had kind of let the whole thing get out of hand.  I never encouraged any of this, but because I never overtly discouraged it, it got beyond me.  I mean, it wasn’t like he professed his undying love for me, but he did make his intentions clear.  While I have joked about my substandard flirting skills, my “rejecting of men” skills are even worse, as I often don’t find myself in the position of having to do so.  I’m sure I’ll be able to mutter something, but I feel bad all the same.

Oh, how ironic I find all of this – as GSS has never actually rejected me, I have been tacitly encouraged to keep flirting with him; all the while, my refusal to see the reality of the situation with my student has put me on the other side of the situation.  Freakin’ hilarious, no?

Enough screwing around!  I need to do some sort of work.

Advertisements